Yesterday, a day I did not post, was not a particularly good day. To say that I am prone to periods of ennui (love that word!) is not news to anyone who knows me well. Then again, such feelings of desolation are often vague feelings of loneliness that go away when I am in the presence of people I love--well, perhaps not always, it is sometimes the actions of my family (or lack thereof) that triggers them.
Yesterday's listlessness was probably more a feeling of laziness in the face of overwhelming amounts of housework--any amount of housework is overwhelming to me--and a certain amount of self-pity, as in "why am I the only one who does this crap?" And yet there are millions of people (most likely women) who take on the daily drudgery of keeping chaos at bay, why should I feel so persecuted? It wasn't until I watched "Clean House" (at 9 pm) that I finally got the motivation to empty the dishwasher and put away the dishes that I must wash by hand. With a great sense of irony I realized that the ordering of the chaos is exactly what the creation of the world is all about, and so in some sublime way "keeping house" is divine in nature. Whether true or not, it does help to get through what often seem to be the mindless tasks of cleaning.
And yet, in every instance where I brought a sense of mindfulness to the tasks at hand, they always seemed to have some sort of relevance in the grand scheme of things. They can even become (dare I say?) pleasurable. After all, the universe does not exactly take care of itself. It has not been created and abandoned, at least not in my estimation or observation. Like anything that is brought into being, be it a child, a garden, a work of art or beauty, it must be nurtured, maintained, even repaired if it is to endure and bless the world. And just as the Spirit brooded over water at the dawn of creation, She continues to sustain our very breathing, long before and long after we have take our first and last breaths. In a very real, but unfathomable way "before" and "after" are not even relevant in the realm of Spirit, only now.
That is precisely why mindfulness in the doldrums of life is so essential. We can get lost in the sheer discouragement of believing that the thing we could be doing is far more relevant or important than what we are doing at this particular moment in time. At this particular moment I am typing these words, and what is most fascinating to me is that they are not at all what I intended to write--they really aren't. I believed I was going to write about how all the mundane stuff in my life keeps me from the really significant stuff--how beating back the clutter of day to day is a thankless, boring task that has no cosmic relevance. How wrong I can be.
Curing cancer and securing world peace appear to be more significant achievements in a world that says it values those things, but more often values material success and fame. Yet it is likely those ends will be accomplished by one soul whose mother or father or someone kept their child of monumental achievement clothed, fed, clean, engaged, encouraged and most of all, loved. It was Mother Teresa who said, "do small things with great love." The small thing is what sustains all of creation moment to moment, the small thing, done with the greatest Love. Washing dishes can have tremendous consequences and tremendous power.
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